[pullquote style=”right” quote=”dark”] The reason why NLP techniques always seem to work because it models what successful people do and helps us to achieve our desired outcomes faster.[/pullquote] Whether you’re a manager, parent, business owner or an employee, you will want to master this one very important life skill – influence! Not just any kinds of influence but effective and positive influence on others to successfully deliver your ideas, thoughts and services across to others.
If you’re like many others who are frustrated at their capacity to influence others effectively, whether in a group or 1-1 setting, then you may want to start taking a serious look at how to elegantly and easily influence with NLP.
But first…
Why Influence with NLP?
For the past 10 years, I have found tremendous success in either using NLP selling techniques and principles to increase my own sales or training my clients to improve their sales performance.
The reason why NLP techniques always seem to work because it models what successful people do and helps us to achieve our desired outcomes faster.
Here are the five principles of success that I’ve discovered over the years which led me to increase my clients’ influence with NLP:
- Know what you want– Perhaps the key to improving your influence starts with self. In any NLP coaching programs, we learn that success comes with knowing EXACTLY what you want. Most people are unsuccessful at influence because they do not have a clear idea of their goals. For instance, if a parent knows his outcome is to persuade his child to do his homework, he will do nothing short of achieving his desired results (not getting into a heated argument with his son).
- Building trust with the person you wish to influence. Besides knowing what you specifically want, you will also have to create sufficient rapport with the person you’d like to influence. After all, have you ever been influenced by someone you dislike?In NLP, practitioners will learn how to use a powerful technique to build rapport with their clients far more efficiently and effectively than traditional methods. Known as matching and mirroring, you can use this NLP technique to establish rapport with anyone whom you have just met within minutes or even seconds. Through the use of matching and mirroring, you can also make others like you since this technique works on the universal principle that people like people who are like themselves.
- Manage your state– This is probably something that most other training programs will not tell you. But I believe this is one of the most critical factors for success in influence.In NLP, we usually devote a significant amount of time discussing on the importance and strategies of managing one’s state. Whenever you in a resourceful state, you may have realized how much easier it is for you to influence another person. This also means being certain about knowing and getting what you want. According to NLP expert Anthony Robbins, when two people come together, the one who is more certain about what he wants will always influence the other. For instance, it will be extremely hard for a salesperson to sell a product to a prospect who is certain that he doesn’t need or want the product.
- Be a needs provider. To become a champion in influence, you have to understand peoples’ needs. In NLP courses, there are various tools we can use to elicit someone’s needs. For example, one of the best tools you may wish to consider using is the NLP meta-programs. They refer to a set of advanced thinking patterns that control what a person perceive.Through the study of the NLP meta-programs, you will be able to find out what a person’s ‘hot buttons’ are and influence him easily. For instance, the Representation System is a great meta-program you can study in a person to know if he is more visual-inclined, auditory-inclined, or kinaesthetic-inclined. When dealing with a person who is more visual-inclined, you will find it relatively easier to influence him by showing him what he needs to do. On the other hand, people who are auditory-inclined have to be told what to do.
- Be flexible– Of course, the final key to increase your influence is to approach every individual differently. Just like the old saying, different strokes should be used for different folks. With wide array of tools under your disposal, you should keep an open mind when it comes to influence. Keep changing your approach till you get what you want. As the NLP Presupposition states, there are no ineffective communicators, but inflexible communicators.